Silver Linings

I was cleaning up a pile of papers today and I found my calendar from 2009. I keep my calendars for a few years because I can check back to see when important appointments happened, birthdays etc. When I found the calendar I sat down to flip through it. I looked at the dates in January. Knowing that Scott’s transplant would be on January 29 I looked carefully at the weeks and days leading up to Jan.29 and remembered what I was doing. I had many names of people written on the days. These were the names of people who offered to bring meals to my family and care for my kids while I went to the hospital. I am again overwhelmed by the enormous amount of service we received during those months before and after the transplant.

As I turned the calendar to February I noticed a change. I was not at home during all of February and most of March. There were a few things written on the calendar in my writing but I noticed the writing of my mother-in-law and mom as they each spent many weeks caring for our 4 busy children. They wrote in birthday parties, school field trips, lessons and other events just as I would have. It hit me hard today how much they – along with their husbands and my siblings – did for our family during that very difficult time. I had a need at that time. I needed my kids to be cared for so I could care for Scott. My wonderful family and friends stepped in and loved my children and met their needs when I wasn’t available.

I don’t think my kids were negatively affected at all by the whole experience. Instead I think they learned many important, positive lessons. They learned that prayers are answered as they prayed daily for their Dad. They learned that in their time of need they can count on others to support and help them. They learned that there are good – no GREAT – people in their family, at church, in their schools and communities. They learned to help each other. Many, many times my younger kids were tucked into bed by their older siblings. They learned of love, miracles and family.

I’m still not at the point where I am grateful that Scott needed a heart transplant. I do have the perspective now to be grateful for some of the silver linings that came along with it though. Maybe one day I’ll understand better why we needed to have this experience but for now I’ll just keep looking for the silver linings.